Light Show

A brilliant, almost blinding, flash of fractured lightning dances across the darkened mountain valley. Vance always enjoyed watching Mother Nature's light shows, they are more like huge fireworks displays. Always wonderful explosions of color and light that could never be duplicated by man.

A few seconds later the distant sound of thunder reaches his ears. He was always enthralled as the lightning flashed across ridge lines and hill tops, briefly illuminating everything around it in mystical silver blue-light. Vance knew of a few spots that provided for the best view of these light shows. Most of them, of course, were on high scenic overlooks from the many mountain passes. There was no rain, and would not be; just the breath taking and dangerous thunderstorm. The air felt heavy and fresh, saturated with electricity. He was amazed at the fierceness of the storm, knowing the dangers that could follow. It was not uncommon for these "dry" storms to strike the mountain park. It was considered a semi-arid region, and had below average rainfall every year. Of course, the snow and cold in winter made up for it.

A mountain park is a high mountain plateau surrounded on all sides by continuous mountain ranges. This particular mountain park, South Park, has elevations ranging from 9,000 feet to around 10,400 feet, and encompasses 2,200 square miles. It is surrounded by The Continental Divide on the north and east, the Mosquito Range with it's "14'ers" on the West, Kenosha Pass, Tarryall Mountains, and Puma Hills to the South and East. No matter which direction you went, to get out of South Park you had to cross a mountain pass. Being on the southern side of the Continental Divide, it seldom rained, and could be bitter cold in the winter with nearly hurricane force winds.

Vance never did like rain, he knew it was necessary and helpful, but didn't like it. He would rather work in below-freezing weather and snow than rain. There was something about being soaked throuh that brought his spirits down and left him in a frustrated mood. It seemed to him that the rain hampered every effort he made to complete his projects. Snow, on the other hand, was an insulator and left a clean fresh slate every time. During rain storms Vance regularly found himself longing for winter to arrive, and quickly.

Vance was concerned for the potential of fires caused by the storm. He dreaded the possibility of many acres of forested land that could be laid to waste, or someones home destroyed. But still he watched, waited and wondered where it would strike next. The anticipation of the event keeping him frozen in place like a child waiting to open that first gift on Christmas Day. Then the lightning would strike again, fracturing and sending rivulets of light bounding from unseen object to unseen object. Never the same, always a slightly different shade or intensity and color, expressing Mother Nature's creativity for all to see and appreciate. Moving closer, always closer.

The thunder came a little quicker, louder, and seemed to roll along the hills, forcing its way through his consciousness. Time between spectacular visual display and the ever-increasing auditory response became shorter and shorter, like a countdown to some profound happening. The air became charged with a intensive feel of electricity that sent chills up his spine, and left Vance with goose bumps. As the storm moved ever closer, and became more and more violent and dangerous. Vance sought the safety of his truck where he could watch as the storm encompassed his sanctuary and then passed.

Once the storm moved on, leaving Vance feeling sated and refreshed, he could return home for a tranquil and absolute sleep.

Just a bit of fiction, Vance is not a real person and not intended to reflect any real person except perhaps me. Based on my own favorite pass time of watching lightning storms in the mountains of South Park.

I thought I might "test the waters" and see what every body thought of some of my stuff. I have quite a few things like this, but no real stories to go with them yet. Maybe I'll come up with some ideas for a running chapter book. I need a plot!

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livelife365 said...

Hey, Eric, nice job. Writing, especially fiction, is not as easy as some think. I should know--I have been writing fiction for over 15 years. You already have a lot going for you: a passion for reading, the desire to write (you have two blogs), and a vivid imagination. As for finding a plot, I suggest reading some good books on writing--Stephen King's "On Writing" is very good. And "The Lie That Tells The Truth," by John Dufresne, is outstanding.
Keep on keeping on...


Eric S. said...

livelife365, Thanks I seem to be able to come up with these short little excerpts, but have difficulty forming the rest of a story. I'll check out those books, and see if I can come up with something. I do have an idea, and am working on an outline and character base. This may fit in, may not who knows. My ideas usually flow sporadically instead of all at once.

redchair said...

Hi Eric,

Great blog and story. I love the design of your site also.

As my king of California says, "I'll be back."

Jena Isle said...

Hi Eric, Wow, it's pretty good. Better than what I write. C'mon, you have these all and you don't use them?

I like how you described the scene piece by piece. It's like I was there too - very vivid and active.

Pls. write your story. I was disappointed when it ended, had wanted it to go on.

Just write your story. Now you have a fan...(smiles).

I look forward to it. Cheers!

Eric S. said...

Redchair, Thanks for stopping by, and your welcome any time. I liked your post, and am working on one to link to you.

Jena Isle, Thanks you very much, I don't know about better than you, just a little different. At least you are completing a story, LOL.

Chat Blanc (aka Sandy) said...

I enjoyed your descriptions, I was transported to the mountains and got a feel for Vance and his perspective. Thanks for sharing your writing! :)

Eric S. said...

Chat blanc, or should I call you Sandy, LOL thanks for coming by and for the compliments. This is the first time I posted any of my fiction. I had fun writing it, and have been getting good responses.

I like your site also.

Kel said...

Interesting. I've pulled it into a standalone document and ran a light "proofing" which I'll send by email, hopefully, tomorrow. Hopefully because our network crashed at PSI during the heat wave Friday and still isn't up.

That's part of what I do at PSI, technical editing ~ mostly for the many first-generation immigrants in the engineering corp, but also for a number of the other folk.

I think the post above, on companionship rings more true, cleaner, honest. The visit with Vance feels a bit . . . cerebral?

Not that I can really talk here. I mean, you've the courage to put a piece of fiction out here. That's seriously amazing. I admire this side of you Rico; very much.

Kel said...

Sigh . . . I need to figure a way to better proof my posts. I just noticed at least two missing commas above. ^$#^%#^%#

Jules said...

My goodness. You write very well. I would say that I am a picky reader. Like the other comments you received, I felt disappointed that I couldn't read on.

I've always heard it's easier to write about something you love and or know about. I think when Vance get's home he is greeted by an aloof chihuahua that is mad the Vance left him home! His usual companion when he went anywhere.

I just love a story with a dog!!
Very big Dean Koontz fan....

Another chapter please???

tashabud said...

Eric, I'm so sorry that I haven't read your post sooner. Life got in the way so much with my blogging last week; it didn't give me any time to make my usual rounds.

I'm truly impressed. Like Jena, you write much, much better than I. Your style of writing is poetic with a touch of romanticism. I can visualize the mountains in Colorado as I read your post.

Eric S. said...

Kel, Thank you, I need a good proof, and it will be a real help to see where I am "messing up" on my grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure. English was not my best subject. Not surprising, Reading and Math was.

Jules, Thank you very much, it took me while to build up the courage to post this. All the comments are bolstering my confidence quite a bit.

There may be a dog, or more correctly a "team of dogs" that enter into the story soon. That seems to be developing in my head. I won't say what breed, but it won't be Chihuahua, LOL.

Tashabud, Thank you also. I will never claim to be better than anyone else. We all have our style, and it work great for each of us. I personally love your writing, and am jealous of your creativity and imagination.

I can assure you that those who know me best would never relate the word "romantic" to me, LOL. I take the compliment of poetic as great praise, for I do love good poetry, just wish I could write some.


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